As Parents we want to be helpful to our kids. We want to provide support for their needs and we do not want to bring harm to them. This leaves us in a quandary when we have a child that has developed an unhealthy body composition. It seems like we are in a double bind. If we do not say anything then the problem will persist and possibly get worse. This will leave our children with health challenges and psychological struggles that may last a lifetime. If we do say something to our children about their weight then we risk causing them shame that they may carry for a lifetime. So how do we help their health without being condemning?
We start by saying nothing. Actions do not take words and often do not need words. We realize that there is a problem and we formulate a plan to attack the problem. Use your resources. Read the other blogs on this site. Listen to Podcasts like Move It with Dr. Jon. Talk to your physician. Once you realize the changes that need to be made…make them.
As a parent all you need to do is to start doing things definitely. You don’t have to tell them what you are doing or even why. You just start making changes. These changes have to involve the entire family. It will not work if you try to eliminate certain foods from just one person in the household. It will not be accepted if only one person in the house has to increase their activity. This includes parents. Kids will only buy into a system when everyone participates.
Eventually kids will ask why there are changes. Then how do we answer? We answer in a general loving way that does not place blame on anyone. Generic answers are going to be the best. Things like “We need to be healthier as a family” or “I have decided that we need to do things differently” should suffice. If the child continues to ask questions and asks specifically about themselves then continue to be honest in a loving and non condemning manner. There is no reason to use words like fat or obese. Keep it on a level that is honest but this is a situation that does not call for brutal honesty.
In the end if you want to help your child with body composition problems your actions are so much more important than your words. So start with your own action of getting some knowledge and formulating a plan for the family. Then put the plan in action. Remember movement is the best preventative medicine.
